[ of all the physical exertion Keigo's drawing out of him, this is the one that makes his heart beat the quickest and robs him of breath. the stillness that follows those words isn't a tease, isn't a retreat just to tease, but rather comes from a very sobering place that follows the dusk of something in him being touched he wasn't expecting. his eyes shift down, over the hook of Keigo's shoulder and across his flushed and moving chest, across his belly where those fingers settle on his at the very base of his gut — ]
[ and he hates that what twists the coil tighter in his own belly isn't the needy insistence of his hips or how tight that ring of muscle feels right around his cockhead or even the sight of his hard, flushed cock beading precum near both of their hands, but just that gentle touch — that sweet intimacy that's so hard for him to indulge in but he can never seem to stop craving like a parched desert wanderer. ]
...Fuck. [ he says it slowly, a pained mutter as his eyes flutter closed, an expletive that wars the way he's embraced every other weight that's settled on him this night. it really feels like a final threshold, the crazed leap into the cold water when he's only been sticking his toes in it now and then for the past two years. nothing left to do but... take a deep breath and jump. ]
Yeah, I know. I know what you need.
[ because it's the same thing he needs. what Keigo wears so obviously Guanshan tries to bury, but in the end — they're both people who just need to be feel wanted. to drown all of that out in weed and casual, rough fucking had served its purpose in Lagunbiru and even up to this point, but now there's a body stretched over his and a loneliness he can't help but pour himself into, even if it means making everything overflow — and he shows him that by turning his palm over, pressing lifelines to lifelines, and gripping until his knuckles are white. ]
[ a thigh slides up between Keigo's own and he rolls just a little, other arm cushioning his head where it would otherwise be pressed to the mattress, and he pushes. with Keigo pinned halfway between his weight and the bed, he buries back in slowly, moving his mouth over the other man's, kisses hot and passionate as he resumes a rhythm that's grinding and sensual over a pounding intended to get someone off. he's a coiled, full-bodied embrace around the man he rocks into, groaning into their kiss, letting it part when it feels right and resuming again when their breaths have all but mingled, groaning and panting into him. ]
[ if the wall around his heart had been that of a dam, it's now cracked and leaking, holed and gushing freely. ]
no subject
[ and he hates that what twists the coil tighter in his own belly isn't the needy insistence of his hips or how tight that ring of muscle feels right around his cockhead or even the sight of his hard, flushed cock beading precum near both of their hands, but just that gentle touch — that sweet intimacy that's so hard for him to indulge in but he can never seem to stop craving like a parched desert wanderer. ]
...Fuck. [ he says it slowly, a pained mutter as his eyes flutter closed, an expletive that wars the way he's embraced every other weight that's settled on him this night. it really feels like a final threshold, the crazed leap into the cold water when he's only been sticking his toes in it now and then for the past two years. nothing left to do but... take a deep breath and jump. ]
Yeah, I know. I know what you need.
[ because it's the same thing he needs. what Keigo wears so obviously Guanshan tries to bury, but in the end — they're both people who just need to be feel wanted. to drown all of that out in weed and casual, rough fucking had served its purpose in Lagunbiru and even up to this point, but now there's a body stretched over his and a loneliness he can't help but pour himself into, even if it means making everything overflow — and he shows him that by turning his palm over, pressing lifelines to lifelines, and gripping until his knuckles are white. ]
[ a thigh slides up between Keigo's own and he rolls just a little, other arm cushioning his head where it would otherwise be pressed to the mattress, and he pushes. with Keigo pinned halfway between his weight and the bed, he buries back in slowly, moving his mouth over the other man's, kisses hot and passionate as he resumes a rhythm that's grinding and sensual over a pounding intended to get someone off. he's a coiled, full-bodied embrace around the man he rocks into, groaning into their kiss, letting it part when it feels right and resuming again when their breaths have all but mingled, groaning and panting into him. ]
[ if the wall around his heart had been that of a dam, it's now cracked and leaking, holed and gushing freely. ]
I got you.
[ he does. ]